Before I show you the answer for the last challenge, let me say that it’s being really funny sharing this crazy blog with you, despite some grammar mistakes and a certain naked woman (who wasn’t naked). About the pins, I knew that you’d like drawing those pins, which by the way are amazingly awesome!!! (Still waiting for it…). Nice work my child.
And now it’s time to get the job done. If I remember correctly you wanted a list of the 13 worse things that can come out of an Easter egg. You also gave 3 examples for the list, but I’m only going to use 2. Because, if I really understood the “symbology” of the first, I must disagree with you on that one (friendship reasons).
So here’s the list:
13 and 12 - The philosophy test and drunk Alfredo – So agent, I admit, these are prety bad. But my sadistic mind can do really worse.
11 – Another Egg – At first you could think – Yeah free egg! – But then you realize that, if instead of a surprise gift, is a smaller egg, the gift inside the second egg is going to be smaller too. I usually like to keep things short and simple, but, when it comes to eggs I love it big! Like Big Mike’s size (you know what I’m talking about).
10 – Coupon – “Congrats you’ve eaten one of our smelly and bad tasting eggs! And now you won a 10% of discount in an also miserable prize!” – Imagine all the crap who could cam with this: Soundtracks of “Morangos com Açúcar”, Barbie’s and Action Eunuchs, trips to “Três Minas” or “Soutelo”, or…..wait for it…. can’t believe I’m going to say this….. A SMALLER EGG! AAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
9 – The Code – Is the name I’ve created for those situations when, we need to send a text message with “the code” (or something similar) for the possibility of winning a prize. “We sell thousands of empty eggs and gave away only a dozen of gifts, so, anyone can call us crooks”. In conclusion this is bad because you pay for the egg, then for the message and the possibility of winning something is 1/100000.
8 – Nothing – this one is like a borderline between the bad and the horrendous. I must warn you! If you’re not impressed with my work so far, do not underestimate me for the top 7.
7 – Naked Kramer – Seinfeld was probably the first American TV show that I’ve seen and probably one of the best. Kramer was a main character of the show. I remember him when I see Chuck’s friends (especially Jeff and Morgan). He was fantastic but in a couple of times he has appeared naked, and that my friend wasn’t awesome (believe me). I also know that you’re really fancy for the “naked man” but you should pass Kramer.
6 – Lifetime Pass to VPA’s Disco – “Welcome to Sausage Land, where you can find 30 man for each woman, the music sucks since we open until we close and you can spend 25€ in only 3 drinks!” – I do not waste more time with this one. (Actually I spent 26€ in 3 drinks).
5 – Mom’s recording messages – You probably know that when I was young I wasn’t exactly an easy child. My mom was always telling me: “Go to bed”, “brush your teeth”,”do your homework”, “don’t play with your sister’s nose”, “and don’t do experiments that could burn the house!”… She told me that so many times that one day she threatened me that would record those sentences and play them if I was doing something wrong. You have to admit this is much worse than the “music box” which you’ve referred at the other post.
4 – Sunglasses in a rainy day – This is the group of gifts, which are amazing, but for some reason also useless, like sunglasses in a rainy day, skis in the desert, a parachutes in a cave, condoms at Alfredo’s house….
3 – My book of jokes – If I ever write a book of jokes the average of suicides would increase in 31% (this scientifically proven). So my evil plan for the future is to write a jokes book in croatian. Because I love Croatia!!! “TE SISANJE”. Under any circumstances do not open an egg if you don’t know who gave you (could be mine hihihihi).
2 – Nerd Remix Album – There are some people, like us, who sometimes express themselves with “Fame Quotes” from movies and TV series, like, “awesome”, “suit up”, “It’s over 9000”, “This is Sparta”, “I love being purple”… But they (we) aren’t the nerds; the real nerds are the guys who upload remixed versions of those quotes to YouTube. Now imagine an album only with quotes remixed.
1 – “The Letter” – When I first read your challenge my first Idea was Chuck Norris jumping out from an egg and killing everything around him only with a blink of an eye. But then I realize that would be awesome. And latter that day I have a crazy dream, where I was eating an Easter egg and inside of it I found a note like this one:
Greetings Agents
I come this way to inform you that starting from this moment I will be assuming the control of the entire operation “Alfredo Needs to Get Laid Project”.
In other words, your blog it’s mine!!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Hugs and Kisses
J. Leno
J. Leno
Thank God it was just a dream! I’m hungry!!!
I will be waiting for your verdict concerning this creepy but sweet list. See you on round 4
KISS
P.S.: Chuck Norris is so awesome because he was the only thing we could not stick inside an Easter egg.
P.P.S.: To have an idea how I woke up in that morning click here.
P.P.P.S.: Camping with negative degrees could be a good reason to burn the camping tent next to you.
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